Forgiveness is defined as the intentional and voluntary
process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings
and attitude regarding an offense.
It is letting go of negative emotions such as vengefulness,
with an increased ability to wish the offender well.
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends,
but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written:
‘It is mine to avenge;
I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
We are often apprehensive
because we feel that forgiveness
means we must once again
to the same obnoxious, toxic,
mean-spirited, destructive abusers...
and trust them again.
To the contrary...
forgiveness does not mean
forgiveness is based on grace.
Trust... is something one must earn.
Yes, we should be cautious of someone
who knew we would be hurt...
and they did it anyway!
Forgiving someone doesn’t excuse that person
or declare that person is not guilty of wrongdoing.
Calling someone to forgiveness is not a license
to be nebulous with the interpretation of a situation.
Forgiveness does not mean instant reconciliation.
Forgiveness and reconciliation are two separate things.
We can (and should) forgive those who sin against us.
Forgiveness is something that takes place between
the one who has been hurt and God.
Sometimes it is best to forgive that person in your heart...
We don't always have to tell them
we have forgiven them.
our gracious forgiveness to someone
who has not asked to be forgiven
may be a manipulation to make them feel guilty.
It also is a form of pride.
We forgive, not to set the other person free –
only God can save people.
We forgive because God wants to set us free!
Here’s the conventional way of thinking:
When someone does something that is hurtful to us,
people on the sidelines can be quick to expect that
we need to forgive and forget... all is well...
and we can go back to business as usual.
They are quick to assume...
if the offender is not sorry or continues to hurt us,
our job is to overlook everything and turn the other cheek.
We can forgive someone
even if we never can
get along with them again.
Forgiveness does not change the past,
but in forgiving, we learn about the heart of God...
forgiveness is a central part of God’s heart.
We might be completely justified on a human level to be
upset, angry, and embittered,
but those feelings, emotions,
and anger is not what God intended for our souls.
Let us forgive
so that we can, whole-heartedly walk in our calling.
does not involve the other person, exclusively.
Forgiving means the healing of our soul.