God’s forgiveness is never-ending, and God's forgiveness
is as constant as our need for forgiveness. God's
forgiveness is not conditional, wavering, or subject to
being embezzled or misappropriated. God's forgiveness is
total and complete.
One of the greatest attributes of Jesus
is His forgiving heart.
On the cross… Jesus said…
for they know not what they do."
Jesus purchased God's forgiveness on our behalf when He
became the Lamb of God and died on the cross for us.
Jesus forgave those who had wronged Him and did not
become a slave to hurt feelings and resentments.
Ultimately, the path to healing is to follow Jesus' example.
When someone we love hurts us... the gravity of
physical and/or verbal wounds can stay open and leave
one with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness, resentments,
and even thoughts of hateful counter-blows. These
emotions can take root and destroy one's peace of mind,
body, and soul.
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends,
but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written:
‘It is mine to avenge;
I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
We must make a decision to forgive from the heart
regardless of the offenses and regardless of the lack of
remorse of the offending party. We must forgive simply
because we have been forgiven by God in Jesus Christ,
and because we do not want to leave any open doors for
the tormenting works of Satan.
Forgiveness is defined as the willful and chosen process
by which the injured and/or wounded party experiences a
change in heart and attitude regarding an offense.
It liberates us from negative-immobilizing-emotions such
as bitterness, rage, and vicious-vindictive-maliciousness.
God is able to help us forgive those who hurt us.
greater intelligence, as well as... peace of mind,
body, and spirit.
One of the higher marks of Spiritual maturity is when we
are able to let go of negative emotions and allow the
higher self to wish the offender well... even if the
relationship is never reconciled.
There will be times when others commit wrongs
Some destructive abusers feel like they have to be right,
negative, demanding, and keep the offended stuck in an
apologetic mode. Some of our critics seem to love to
wrestle, drag, and brow beat us into their
negative-emotional-drama. They treat negativity and
drama like it's oxygen.
Some abusers are like pigs whose main desire is to get us
just as grimy and dirty as they are.
Mark Twain, Abraham Lincoln, and George Bernard Shaw
have all been cited as saying it best...
"Never wrestle with pigs. You both get
dirty and the pig likes it."
This metaphorical adage warns us not to engage, wallow
or plot against disrespectful, dirty-hearted, malicious
critics. If or when we do... we can expect to possibly be
smeared, dirtied up and/or contaminated.
Our critics can often leave us feeling a
little apprehensive about forgiving.
They can be quick to misunderstand or
outright reject us.
Some of us are made to believe or
feel that forgiveness means
pretending the offense never happened,
condoning the offense by wiping the
slate clean, or allowing others to take
advantage of us and once again expose
ourselves to what could be the same
rude, devilish, inconsiderate,
emotionally toxic, mean-spirited,
unreasonable behavior and trusting
To the contrary...
forgiveness does not mean minimizing
the wrong, denying reality, or
forgetting and excusing the harm or
hurt done to us.
Forgiveness brings a kind of peace
that helps us to go on with life and
not get swallowed up by bitterness
or a sense of injustice.
Mighty warriors of God, forgiveness
is based on grace... not our works.
God closely watches all mankind,
and God is able to bless us with
mercies for each of our woes.
With God we are able to pass safely
through the sea of distress and
forgive those who have wronged us.
God is able to control, overcome,
quiet, and subdue our enemies.
When our intentions are pure... we
are genuinely able to embrace
forgiveness and move on. Forgiveness
paves the way for our emotional,
Spiritual, and physical healing.
Forgiveness does not diminish
us... contrarily... forgiveness grows us.
It actually works like fertilizer to
repair us, restore us, rebuild us, and
revive us. It is great medicine for the
mind and soul.
Anytime we undergo something
difficult... it helps us to become
a better person... even when it hurts.
Unforgiveness hinders us. It ties us
down to past hurts and robs us of
the full life God intends for us.
Those bitter roots can rise up and
leave openings for Satan to derail us.
We help ourselves most... when we
stop nursing the offense. Let us resist
the devil in his attempt to poison
our spirit with bitterness.
God has the benefit of being able to
see into our hearts to measure the
sincerity of our remorse. When we
humbly cry out to God...
God allows us to let go, lead the
change, and move forward with a
lighter heart and greater peace.
Forgiveness releases us from the
heavy and burdensome clutches
of resentment, depression, and
possibly high blood pressure.
Yes, forgiveness is grace extended
to the offender, but it is more
important for us... than the
Forgiveness can put the darkness
behind us and keep us from being
consumed with anger. It can set us free
from the hurt and/or harm caused by
another. It can loosen the clutches
of grudges, stress, and bitterness.
When we forgive and relinquish the
right to seek personal revenge... we
can sleep in peace and wake up every
morning with joy and lightness in our
This in and of itself can help maintain
and/or restore our peace of mind and
improve our overall health and well
However legally or morally justified we might feel or be,
rather than allowing bitterness and anger to pollute our
physical, mental, and spiritual well-being...
we can forgive the offender and release the burden and
realize greater peace in our soul.
We can forgive even if we never can get along
with them again.
There is quite a bit of misinformation which does not truly
or completely represent the facts or reality of how the
sincere process of forgiveness works.
We often believe that forgiveness and the healing of
wounds should be instantaneous, but that is not
Forgiveness can help us look at our wounds through
different lenses, but it’s not the Healer, God is.
We can forgive someone and still feel the pain, hurt, or
sting from their actions years later, but that doesn’t mean
we haven’t forgiven the person.
Forgiving someone doesn’t excuse the behavior
or declare that person is justified or not guilty of
wrongdoing. Forgiveness does not have anything to do
with accepting bad behavior. It is a spiritual discipline that
frees us and releases us from the baggage of negativity.
When we let go and let God be God over the situation...
the weight of anxiety, and grappling with hurt feelings,
and the harm inflicted upon us... will be lifted from us.
May we all come to realize that nothing is served
by lording unforgiveness over another's head.
There are many who feel like they haven't fully forgiven
because their trust hasn't been restored.
To the contrary, one must earn trust,
not expect it.
The offender has to be willing to pay the price by dealing
with the consequences of their actions.
Yes, we should be cautious of those who knew we
would be hurt... and they did it anyway!
The shockwaves of a betrayal can reverberate for months,
even years after the fact. It is something people often get
confused with or equate to forgiveness.
Genuine trust doesn't happen
overnight and neither should it.
Trust is a process. It is not just given.
It is shared and developed over
Trust is like a seed. As a seed sprouts up and becomes
strong... it begins to enmesh the people in the relationship.
Calling someone to forgiveness does not mean that we
must subject ourselves to the same mean-spirited,
toxic individuals who search for our faults, take
pleasure in our pain and suffering, and are deeply angered
by our joy and/or progress.
Forgiveness does not mean instant reconciliation.
Some toxic relationships around us will need to be distant
or removed. In many cases we won’t have to shut the
offender all the way out, even if the offender
has already shut us out.
According to Romans 12:19 and Hebrews 10:30,
"They will be held accountable by God."
We must, in many cases, do ourselves a favor
and love some people from a distance.
Spiritual maturity is knowing when to let go and walk
away from people and circumstances that threaten our
peace of mind, produce unpleasant, poisonous,
unwholesome, unnecessary, and/or unwelcome
Some people generally think:
When someone does something that is hurtful to us,
these are mainly those people on the sidelines, they can be
quick to expect that we need to forgive and forget... all is
well... and we can go back to business as usual.
They are quick to assume... if the offender is not sorry or
continues to hurt us, our job is to overlook everything
and turn the other cheek.
While God commands us to forgive others, God never told
us to keep subjecting ourselves to those who have
wounded us and violated our trust.
around mean-spirited people who hurt us.
Forgiveness and reconciliation are two separate things.
Reconciliation and restoration is a process. Forgiveness is
surrendering any anger, bitterness, or a vengeful attitude.
We can (and should) forgive those who sin against us and
not get stuck in the pain.
God's Will is justice, and justice will
Forgiveness does not depend on the
behavior or repentance of the offender.
Forgiveness is handing justice over
to God. It is the returning to God the
right to take care of justice.
We don't always have to tell the offender
we have forgiven them.
Self-righteously announcing our gracious forgiveness to
someone who has not asked to be forgiven may be a
manipulation to make them feel guilty.
It also is a form of pride.
We forgive, not to set the offender free –
only God can save people. We forgive because
God wants to set us free!
“Forgiveness is the fragrance
that the violet sheds on the heel
that has crushed it.”
― Mark Twain
Forgiveness does not change the past,
but in forgiving, we learn about the heart of God.
We might be completely justified on a human level to be
upset, angry, and embittered, but those feelings, emotions,
and anger are not what God intended for our souls.
Let us forgive
so that we can, whole-heartedly walk in our calling.
Forgiveness does not involve the other person, exclusively.
Forgiving means the healing
of our soul.
Whatever the offender has done... when we forgive them
and let go of negative emotions, if any,
we can reclaim our peace of mind,
our creative energy, our joy, and personal power...
and that is huge!
Forgiveness comes from God.
When we forgive others... it is much
like an earthly reflection of God.
In His Love,
Carole C. Good