When someone we love hurts us... the gravity of the

physical and/or verbal wounds can leave painful 

life-long scars. These wounds can stay open and leave

 one with lasting feelings of anger, defeat, down-

heartedness, bitterness, resentment, and even thoughts

 of hateful counter-blows. The emotional, physical, and 

Spiritual impact from these wounds can take root and

 destroy one's peace of mind, body, and soul.

Satan's target is our mind!

Satan's weapons are blatant lies!

Unforgiveness is a heavy, cumbersome load we carry 

which causes physical burn-out, spiritual weakness, and 

emotional exhaustion.

Unforgiveness hinders us. It ties us down to past hurts and 

robs us of the full life God intends for us.

Unforgiveness hinders, stagnates, immobilizes and in 

some cases it can totally paralyze us. It ties us down to past

 hurts and robs us of the full life God intends for us.

Withholding forgiveness carries with it heaviness of mind, 

body, and spirit. It often hurts us more than it hurts 

the offender. 

The heaviness of unforgiveness can fester into bitter 

thoughts and actions. Those bitter roots can rise up and 

leave openings for Satan to derail us. 

We help ourselves most... when we stop nursing the 

offense. Let us resist the devil in his attempt to poison 

our mind and spirit with bitterness.

However legally or morally justified we might feel or be, 

rather than allowing bitterness and anger to pollute our 

physical, mental, and spiritual well-being... 

we can forgive the offender and release the burden and 

realize greater peace in our soul. 

Forgiveness is divine, it comes from 

God. It is a central part of God’s heart.

God’s forgiveness is never-ending, and is as constant 

as our need for forgiveness. God's forgiveness is not 

conditional, wavering, or subject to being embezzled or 

misappropriated. God's forgiveness is total and complete.

One of the greatest attributes of Jesus 

is His forgiving heart.

On the cross… Jesus said… 

"Forgive them… 

for they know not what they do."

Jesus purchased God's forgiveness on our behalf when He 

became the Lamb of God and died on the cross for us.

Jesus forgave those who had wronged Him and did not 

become a slave to hurt feelings and resentments. 

Ultimately, the path to healing is to follow Jesus' example.

“Do not take revenge, my dear friends,

but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written:

 ‘It is mine to avenge; 

I will repay,’ says the Lord.” 

Romans 12:19 

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the 

heel that has crushed it.”

― Mark Twain

We must forgive because 

we have been forgiven.

May this be our responsibility toward Christ.

There will be times when others commit wrongs against 

us. We must make a decision to forgive from the heart 

regardless of the offenses, and regardless of the lack of

 remorse of the offending party. We must forgive simply

 because we have been forgiven by God in Jesus Christ, 

and because we do not want to leave any open doors for

 the tormenting works of Satan.

Our critics can often leave us feeling a little apprehensive

 about forgiving. Some of us are made to believe or feel 

that forgiveness means pretending the offense never 

happened, condoning the offense by wiping the slate 

clean, or allowing others to take advantage of us and 

once again expose ourselves to what could be the same

rude, devilish, inconsiderate, emotionally toxic, mean-

spirited, unreasonable behavior and trusting them again.

To the contrary... forgiveness does not mean minimizing 

the wrong, denying reality, or forgetting and excusing the 

harm or hurt done to us. Forgiveness brings a kind of 

peace that helps us to go on with life and not get 

swallowed up by bitterness or a sense of injustice.

Forgiveness can put the darkness behind us and keep us 

from being consumed with anger. It can set us free from

 the hurt and/or harm caused by another. It can loosen the 

clutches of grudges, stress, and bitterness.

Forgiveness brings rest to the weary, comfort for the 

hurting, solace to the heavily laden and rest for the soul.

We forgive, not to set the offender free… only God can 

save people. We forgive because 

God wants to set us free!

Forgiveness is for us. We forgive because a wrong was 

committed. Forgiveness is a gift to our heart. It does not 

erase, forget, excuse, give permission to continue hurtful 

behaviors; nor is it condoning bad behavior, or pretending 

the hurtful past didn’t happened. Neither is forgiveness 

pretending it is okay or deleted from our memory, instead, 

we are set free from carrying a painful burden of spirit and 

we have garnered a valuable life lesson.

 Forgiveness is when we can remember without the dis-

ease of anger.

Forgiveness does not change the past, but it can certainly 

set us free from the hurt and/or harm caused by another. 

When we forgive those who hurt or harmed us, we can

 bind and loosen the clutches of grudges, stress, and 


When we forgive and relinquish the right to seek personal 

revenge... we can sleep in peace and wake up every 

morning with joy and lightness in our hearts. This in and 

of itself can help maintain and/or restore our peace of 

mind and improve our overall health and well being. 

Forgiveness only takes one... 

that's us! 

Forgiveness is something that takes place between the 

one who has been hurt and God. 

When our intentions are pure... we are genuinely able 

to embrace forgiveness and move on. Forgiveness 

paves the way for our emotional, Spiritual, and 

physical healing.

Forgiveness does not diminish us... 

contrarily... forgiveness grows us.

 It actually works like fertilizer to repair us, restore us, 

rebuild us, and revive us. It is great medicine for the 

mind and soul. 

We forgive, not to set the offender free – 

only God can save people. We forgive because 

God wants to set us free!

Forgiveness releases us from the heavy and burdensome 

clutches of resentment, depression, and possibly high 

blood pressure.

When we forgive and relinquish the right to seek personal

 revenge... we can sleep in peace and wake up every 

morning with joy and lightness in our hearts. 

Mighty warriors of God, forgiveness 

is based on grace... not our works. 

God closely watches all mankind, and God is able 

to bless us with mercies for each of our woes. 

With God we are able to pass safely through the sea of 

distress and forgive those who have wronged us. 

God is able to control, overcome, quiet, and subdue our 


 God has the benefit of being able to see into our hearts to 

measure the sincerity of our remorse. When we humbly 

cry out to God... God allows us to let go, lead the change, 

and move forward with a lighter heart and greater peace.

Yes, forgiveness is grace extended to the offender, but it is 

more important for us... than the offender. 

Forgiveness does not depend on the behavior or 

repentance of the offender. Forgiveness is handing justice 

over to God. It is the returning to God the right to take

 care of justice.

Yes, forgiveness is grace extended to the offender, but it is 

more important for us... than the offender. 

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that person should still be 

welcomed in our lives. We can forgive even if we never 

can get along with them again.

Forgiveness means forgiving ourselves for allowing others 

to hurt us. It means we have made peace with the pain.

It is best to sincerely forgive the 

offender, in our heart, before God. 

We don't always have to tell the offender we have forgiven



Self-righteously announcing our gracious forgiveness to

 someone who has not asked to be forgiven may be a


manipulation to make them feel guilty. It also is a form of 


Forgiveness is handing justice over to 

God. It is the returning to God the 

right to take care of justice.

Forgiveness is surrendering any anger, bitterness, or a 

vengeful attitude. We can (and should) forgive those who 

sin against us and not get stuck in the pain.

Forgiving means the healing 

of our soul. 

Whatever the offender has done... when we forgive them 

and let go of negative emotions, if any, we can reclaim 

our peace of mind, our creative energy, our joy, and

 personal power... and that is huge! Forgiveness is the gift 

that keeps on giving.

Forgiveness does not change the past, but in forgiving, we 

learn about the heart of God. We might be completely 

justified on a human level to be upset, angry, and 

embittered, but those feelings, emotions, and anger are not 

what God intended for our souls.

Forgiveness is defined as the willful and chosen process

by which the injured and/or wounded party experiences a 

change in heart and attitude regarding an offense. 

It liberates us from negative-immobilizing-emotions such 

as bitterness, rage, and vicious-vindictive-maliciousness. 

God is able to help us forgive those who hurt us. This 

releasing paves the way to greater understanding, greater

 intelligence, as well as... peace of mind, body, and spirit.

One of the higher marks of Spiritual maturity is when we 

are able to let go of negative emotions and allow the

higher self to wish the offender well... even if the 

relationship is never reconciled. 

There will be times when others 

commit wrongs against us.

Forgiveness does not mean minimizing the wrong, 

denying reality, or forgetting and excusing the harm or

 hurt done to us. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that 

helps us to go on with life and not get swallowed up 

by bitterness or a sense of injustice.

Anytime we undergo something

 difficult... forgiveness helps us to 

become a better person... 

even when it hurts.

Forgiveness paves the way for our emotional, Spiritual, 

and physical healing. Forgiveness does not diminish us...

contrarily... forgiveness grows us. It actually works like 

fertilizer to repair us, restore us, rebuild us, and revive

 us. It is great medicine for the mind, body, and soul. 

We can forgive even if we never can get along 

with them again.

There is quite a bit of misinformation which does not truly 

or completely represent the facts or reality of how the 

sincere process of forgiveness works. 

We often believe that forgiveness and the healing of 

wounds should be instantaneous, but that is not 

necessarily so. 

Forgiveness can help us look at our wounds through 

different lenses, but it’s not the Healer, God is.

We can forgive someone and still feel the pain, hurt, or 

sting from their actions years later, but that doesn’t mean 

we haven’t forgiven the person.

Forgiving someone doesn’t excuse the behavior 

or declare that person is justified or not guilty of 

wrongdoing. Forgiveness does not have anything to do 

with accepting bad behavior. It is a spiritual discipline that 

frees us and releases us from the baggage of negativity.  

When we let go and let God be God over the situation... 

the weight of anxiety, and grappling with hurt feelings, 

and the harm inflicted upon us... will be lifted from us.

May we all come to realize that nothing is served 

by lording unforgiveness over another's head.

There are many who feel like they haven't fully forgiven 

because their trust hasn't been restored. 

To the contrary, one must earn trust, 

not expect it.

The offender has to be willing to pay the price by dealing 

with the consequences of their actions.

Yes, we should be cautious of those who knew we 

would be hurt... and they did it anyway!

Trust is not a quick or painless 


It takes time and patience to 

begin to trust after heartbreak, 

betrayal, and being lied to and lied on.

The shockwaves of a betrayal can reverberate for months, 

even years after the fact. It is something people often get 

confused with or equate to forgiveness. 

Genuine trust doesn't happen 

overnight and neither should it. 

Trust is a process. It is not just given.


It is shared and developed over 


Trust is like a seed. As a seed sprouts up and becomes 

strong... it begins to enmesh the people in the relationship.

Some destructive abusers feel like they have to be right, 

negative, demanding, and keep the offended stuck in an

apologetic mode. Some of our critics seem to love to 

wrestle, drag, and brow beat us into their negative-

emotional-drama. They treat negativity and drama like

 it's oxygen.

Some abusers are like pigs whose main desire is to get us 

just as grimy and dirty as they are.

Mark Twain, Abraham Lincoln, and George Bernard Shaw

 have all been cited as saying it best...

"Never wrestle with pigs. You both get 

dirty and the pig likes it." 

This metaphorical adage warns us not to engage, wallow

or plot against disrespectful, dirty-hearted, malicious 


 If or when we do... we can expect to possibly be 

smeared, dirtied up and/or contaminated.

Calling someone to forgiveness does not mean that we 

must subject ourselves to the same mean-spirited, toxic

 individuals who search for our faults, take pleasure

 in our pain and suffering, and are deeply angered by our

 joy and/or progress. 

Forgiveness does not mean instant reconciliation. Some

 toxic relationships around us will need to be distanced or 

removed. In many cases we won’t have to shut the 

offender all the way out, even if the offender has 

already shut us out. 

According to Romans 12:19 and Hebrews 10:30, 

"They will be held accountable by God."

We must, in many cases, do ourselves 

favor and love some people from 


As we become wiser we begin to realize what we need 

and what we need to walk away from.

Spiritual maturity is knowing when to let go and walk 

away from people and circumstances that threaten our 

peace of mind, produce unpleasant, poisonous,

 unwholesome, unnecessary, and/or unwelcome 

spiritual drama.

Some people generally think:

When someone does something that is hurtful to us,

these are mainly those people on the sidelines, they can be 

quick to expect that we need to forgive and forget... all is 

well... and we can go back to business as usual.

They are quick to assume... if the offender is not sorry or 

continues to hurt us, our job is to overlook everything 

and turn the other cheek.

While God commands us to forgive others, God never told 

us to keep subjecting ourselves to those who have 

wounded us and violated our trust.

We don't have to tolerate, nor should we keep ourselves 

open to lack of respect or any form of abuse.

There is no suggestion that we should like being 

around mean-spirited people who hurt us.

Forgiveness and reconciliation are two separate things. 

Reconciliation and restoration is a process. Forgiveness is 

surrendering any anger, bitterness, or a vengeful attitude.

We can (and should) forgive those who sin against us and 

not get stuck in the pain.

Forgiveness does not change the past. It is the wisdom 

from on high that helps us to understand that what the 

offender did was not okay. God has a way of showing us 

that we cannot change the past. We can; however, accept 

situations that occur in our lives as teachers, whether they 

are good, bad, or indifferent, who provide lessons we 

could not have learned any other way. 

The main take-away is to let go and let God abide... 

regardless of the severity or number of wrongs that others 

commit against us. A festering soul wound creates an 

opening for Satan and his robbing, destructive evils. Let 

us not leave any openings for anger/Satan to hold us 


In forgiving, we learn about 

the heart of God.

We might be completely justified on a human level to be

upset, angry, and embittered, but those feelings, emotions, 

and anger are not what God intended for our souls.

Let us forgive 

so that we can, whole-heartedly 

walk in our calling.

Forgiveness does not involve the other person, exclusively.

Forgiving means the healing 

of our soul. 

Whatever the offender has done... when we forgive them

and let go of negative emotions, if any, 

we can reclaim our peace of mind, 

our creative energy, our joy, and personal power... 

and that is huge!

Forgiveness comes from God. 

When we forgive others... it is much 

like an earthly reflection of God.


In His Love,

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